I want to write a novel, but I don’t have a story idea, writing skills, much free time, tenacity, much imagination, or observational ability needed to write a good novel. What should I do?
Go to dinner with Ashley because she said you need to take her somewhere nice.
You go to an Italian restaurant that you’ve heard a lot about.
Order prosciutto crostino and something like black spaghetti with squid.
Watch a rowdy bunch of men with fancy suits enter.
You see one guy your age, dressed in Brooks Brothers, probably.
Watch the maitre’d greet them.
Watch them hang out by the bar.
Talk with Ashley.
Your waiter brings your food.
Eat your food.
Keep an eye on the guy your age. He never says a word to any of the other lawyers.
“That guy in the suit hasn’t said anything to anyone,” you say.
“But he gets paid a lot of money to stand there,” Ashley says.
Your waiter hands you the bill with an amount that you must pay.
Think about asking one of the lawyers to pay your bill.
Think: “They must make in an hour what I make in a month or something.”
Think: “What is the secret to their success, part two.”
Think: “What about squid spaghetti?”
Think: “If there was anarchy, would we still need lawyers?”
Take out your credit card.
Pay your own bill.
Walk out of the restaurant.
Hand your keys to the valet.
The valet runs behind a dumpster and returns with your car.